Postcards: A Rocking Honeymoon

Dear Mom and Dad,

Enjoying our honeymoon. Hurricane Bob passed. The ship was tilted sideways all night and rocked like the Sea Dragon ride. They strung ropes to pull ourselves around. Lots of puke, broken limbs, a heart attack – but it’s calmer now and the square dancers are back on deck. Headed to Quebec!

Love,

Diane and Mike

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The longer version by Diane goes like this: My actual 1991 honeymoon cruise from New York to Montreal aboard the Regent Sun, which was rudely interrupted by Hurricane Bob. The captain thought he could outrun the storm, but he was wrong. The hurricane overtook us as the captain attempted to head out to sea, tilting the ship precariously on its side. Men in yellow rubber suits nailed boards over the windows, while senior citizens broke arms that were casted by the ship’s doctor, a helicopter airlifted a heart attack victim from the ship, and we were detained by the Coast Guard to search for a missing pleasure boat. But the surreal highlight had to be that the cruise was the annual trip for a national square-dancing club. A mutton-chopped caller would set up a portable record-player with an attached microphone throughout the trip and suddenly boom, “I need a 4 by 4. Come on now!” and older ladies and gentlemen dressed in full square dance regalia would appear from nowhere and dance on the various decks.

We are still married.

Diane McTigue